It’s Conspiracy Theory Time!! Woohoo! Ooohh...ahhh…so exciting!!


MetaTim

Before we dive in to today’s conspiracy theory, it’s important that we examine the dangers of the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon Syndrome. This occurs when random events are inconceivably linked by loose, often unfounded, coincidental connections. Let’s see an example- in fact-let’s use bacon (the food, not the actor):



Fact: Bacon is packed with artery-clogging fat

Fact: Diners and coffee shops are responsible for the distribution of a huge amount of BLT’s, Bacon Egg & Cheeses and such bacon-laden delicacies across the country

Fact: Vegetarians do not eat bacon. (Hmm… suspicious…why is that? What do they know?)

Fact: Vegetarians are often prominent in foodie communities, AND they’ve been known to despise fur wearing, bacon chewing carnivores. Could it be they wield more power than we realize?

Conclusion: Vegetarians are in collusion with a secret network of culinary Czars across America to kill off the carnivorous population by stuffing their arteries full of fat-laden bacon. Yipes!!!!
I knew it all along, guys.


Cyberlawcentre

Not convinced? Okay, I admit that was a bit of a stretch, but imagine this story interspersed with doctors and diagrams pointing to our clogged arteries. Picture a montage of images: angry vegetarians (maybe even picketing...or -cooking! Gasp!), throw in some evil grins, and a row of doe-eyed truck drivers diving into their bacon stuffed delights. Well, I guess you have to be there. But this is all really meant to serve as an example of a flawed argument.  Chances are, if we dig deep enough, we’ll turn up an angry vegetarian or two willing to confirm the whole theory. Never mind the life supply of tofu burgers they received…hypothetically.


Farm5

That being said, I present to you today’s Conspiracy Theory:

Global Warming, Violent Storms and Earthquakes are being caused by our Government.

Really?  OMG! What do you think?

Here are some compelling facts:



Here’s an example of a wild theory…a dagger? Who cares, it’s Apocalyptica…yes!



Here’s a more in-depth analysis, including secret files, contacts and a half-hour of droning narration. The facts ARE compelling- if you stay awake long enough to absorb them.  Hey, can we UP the production value around here or what? We’re talking about the end of the civilization as we know it for goodness sake!!!



Phew. So do you think we’re off hook? Should we turn up the heat, trash our recyclables and break out the gas guzzlers? Um, NO!  But maybe it’s not our fault after all. Or is it? Dun…dun.Dun…dun. Dun…

Though I do have to wonder: if this project is solely for study, why are they transmitters- and NOT receivers!?

What do YOU think?


swanksalot