Greenopolis @ Landshark Stadium

Ok, team, listen up! This is Head Coach Vince Someparty speaking! This is the big game! Today is for the planet! We need you to be single minded, for a single purpose, practicing single stream recycling! Inside that stadium, The Miami Dolphins are going up against the Buffalo Bills. But everybody knows the real action is out here in the parking lot! I’m talking tailgating, team- party t ime before the game. If you aren’t buzzed for the opening kickoff, your head’s not in the game!

We’re going up against a tough opponent, a real mountain of trash - hundreds of thousands of bottles, cans, packaging and paper from the tens of thousands of rabid, devoted fans out here. And they are focused on only one thing! Having a good time! Drinking beer, eating burgers and sausages, and getting themselves primed and pumped for the spectacle on the field.

Our job is to block the path to the landfill, tackle any dummy trying to “throw it away” in the garbage can, and score points for recycling at every opportunity. WM is here with a single stream Recycling Rally to help out, so our bench is strong. Single stream means everything - all recycling- goes in the same bin. I’ve been looking at the statistics - recycling is up over 30% with single stream. But the game ain’t over yet - we’ve still got a ways to go. We’ve got to play some tough defense against garbage.

Ok, here’s today’s assignments: Nitschke, you take newspapers and junk mail. Taylor, you cover plastic bottles - all types. Kramer, you stick to aluminum and steel cans like glue - I don’t want anything slipping by you into the landfill like last time, you hear? Woods and Horning, you’re on special teams today. Let the families know that we can also take school and office paper, cereal and pasta boxes. Even paper with plastic windows. With more and more municipalities going to expanded recycling, it’s going to be easier to make the right play. Farve, you just sit there and age gracefully.

Now I want you to work as a team - there’s going to be lots of recycling opportunities for everyone. I want clean play out there, so take the caps off and rinse everything before it goes in the bin.

WM’s brought a lot of new plays into this game. In addition to the single stream play, there’s LampTracker for compact fluorescent bulbs, The Bagster flexible dumpster - for the really big plays, Big Belly for street games, and Greenopolis for polishing your game online and checking score and the point spread. WM is pretty nimble on and off the field - we’re lucky to have them on our side. You can see their whole playbook at Thinkgreen.com

We’ve got a hot new quarterback prospect here today, Melissa from Greenopolis TV. I’ve watched the videos on her. Her throwing game needs a little work, but in the interviews she’s tackled, her ground game remains strong.

Now if that quarterback can stand in the pocket and take the hit after getting the pass off, you can recycle single stream, eh? After the game we can take all we’ve collected and make it into new products so it can play another day. I heard that there’s 80 bottles per person at this game, but if you keep focused play hard and don’t let up until the final whistle, we can win big!

So let’s wrap this up. You score a touchdown every time you use single stream. Recycling isn’t everything, it’s the only thing. Single Stream. Green is Life. And if you remembered the game, you didn’t party hard enough before it! Now get out there and win one for the planet!

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